wake me up, when december ends

I haven't been very good at writing lately. I think about it, but when it comes to forming thoughts or a theme or SOMETHING to put on the screen, ....nothing. Even right now i'm having a hard time, but i feel like writing. And so i shall.

Let's see... what have i been thinking about lately?

• this month and even YEAR has FLOWN by. I can't believe christmas is in less than a week. When did this year happen? The events of earlier in the year seem SO long ago... years ago even. Yet, they were just a couple of months ago. Funny how time can be a friend and an enemy. When things are hard and miserable, time drags. You realize JUST how long 24 hours actually is... But when things are good, the days and weeks just roll by and suddenly you're at the end of another year and wondering where the time went. I guess i'm glad i'm in a good time right now. :)
• i've learned alot about how even the people who seem like they have it all together, still need love and care once in a while. we focus so much on helping those lost sheep who are down that we often miss the subtle hints of heavy hearts around us. i'm going to try and be better at serving everyone, and not just those i think are in need.
• Heavenly Father makes a way for you to accomplish the things he asks of you. My calling changed this fall and it's changing again soon. In a few short words, I've felt very inadequate.. (HUGE emphasis on the word inadequate) But, i've seen how Heavenly Father has filled in the gaps i have, and made things happen. I'm alot more shy than i let on and sometimes these little things i need to do are hard, but Heavenly Father has always been there.
• You can tell how converted a person is by how willing they are to serve. I've been thinking about this one alot lately, as people have fallen through on callings this semester. And as i write this, i realize it sounds really judgemental of me. Please don't misunderstand. I am not judging. I am merely stating that there is a difference, a physical difference, in those who are willing to serve, any time they are asked, vs. someone who is always finding an excuse not to serve. i find those guys who are always helping out at activities without being asked, very attractive. I want to be with someone like that. Who sees something needs to be done and does it. Who doesn't NEED to be asked. Or merely do it because i want them to. Oh hey, these chairs need to be taken down? Done. But if they are asked, they do so willingly. i sincerely look for that trait specifically in a guy. i... won't take anything less. Probably why i'm not married yet, but, i do know these guys actually exist... i see them every week at church. I'll wait. :)
• Why do old men hate me? I think somewhere they sent out a flyer for all the old men in utah valley to come yell at me at work. I... don't really like being yelled at (weird, i know) so... yeah. They usually end up being funny stories afterward but at the time... i want to drop kick their cane and knock them over. No... Just kidding. But seriously, if anyone sees the advertisement anywhere about coming to yell at me, will you take it down please?
• I need a vacation. I'm going to see jessica for christmas for the weekend, but, i dunno.. i don't really feel like it'll be a vacation because i'm still working a ton. i just switched my days off so i wouldn't miss any work. i'm getting a little burned out. I just need a mini-vay-cay to rejuvinate me. Maybe all the old men are burning me out... Whatever it is, i need some F.U.N. STAT!
• My roommate susan is the best thing since pumpkin pie. She's been a really great support this semester. All my roommates have. Thank you Heavenly Father for hooking me up!
• Heavenly Father answers prayers. Trust him. He knows, everything.
• My favorite song right now is "jar of hearts" by Christina Perri. I think i listened to it a MILLION times on satruday, and even sang it acapella as i did my cleaning check.
• Oh how i hate cleaning checks.

Well, i think that's enough rambling for today. I'd better get to bed but those are just a few of the things that have been rolling around in my head lately.

Goodnight, neverland.